58 Ways to Get Clary Fray
by TheBookWormLoner
Summary: Jace makes a bet with Isabelle to get Clary in 58 different ways. And there is a lot of letting down.
1. Way 1: The Not So Funny Joke

**Welcome to 58 Ways to Get Clary Fray ! Does the title rhyme? Because if it doesn't I'm seriously hating myself for not having it rhyme. LOL, JK, IWTBASOD (I want to be a stripper one day). Like my abbreviation? Yeah ya do! Anyway, this is going to be updated Thursday if you haven't read that already. This is going to be allllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll in Jace's POV unless you want a companion in Clary's. There is going to be so much denial. Okay, without further ado: 58 Ways to Get Clary Fray (I don't own anything except the plot) **

**Way 1:**

"Hey Jace," Isabelle said casually. She wanted something and I knew it.

"What do you want Izzy?" I asked annoyingly.

"I want to make you a bet." She declared.

I froze. When Isabelle Lightwood wanted to make a bet, she made a hard bet.

"And what is that bet?" I questioned.

"I dare you to get Clary in 58 tries."

"And why 58?"

"Because it rhymes with Fray, duh." She shrugged.

"I'm in."

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I watched as Clary laughed. I was seriously being a creep. Simon, Isabelle, Alec, and Mangus were seated in front of her and laughed along with her. Isabelle caught my stare because she looked towards me with an encouraging glance. I stiffened. This was it. I was either going to never have baby's or it would work.

"Hey Clary, can I talk to you?" I asked. I fidgeted with my hands.

"Yeah, sure." She said. She follows me out of the room and everyone wolf whistled.

We stood in the hallway for what seemed like minutes. It was so awkward. You know what they say, the silence was so thick I could cut it with a goat bladder… wait… they don't say that… oops.

"So I was wondering… Um, if you would…"

"What is it Jace?" she said uncomfortably.

"Would you… maybe.."

"Oh by the angels! Jace, what do you want?"

"Do you want to maybe hang out…" I got cut off by her laughing. I look at her, totally flabbergasted. "What is it?"

"Oh Jace your hilarious!" she cried.

"But-"

"Of course I won't hang out with you. Better luck next time." One rejection. 57 to go. 

**I'm sorry this is short but I only have less than half an hour to finish one other story.**


	2. Way 2: The Uh Oh Cake

**Author Note: Sorry about not updating these last couple days. I realized I'm going to need another schedule since I can't use the computer day by day. Okay, This story, 58 Ways to Get Clary Fray, is on Friday; so is iStole Your Phone; Clary Fray and the Amazing Bra on Wednesday; By the Angel Wednesday also; How to be a Teenage Heartbreaker I will fit in on Wednesday; and Snake Bites will also be Friday. Expect late updates on Wednesday though, that's laundry day, and I love doing the laundry. I was thinking. And I wanted to do those fun things where the author communicates with the readers like question of the day. I'll probably forget later but I just want to give it a try. **

**QOD: When was your first kiss? (Okay so I totally want to answer this also because I feel like it. Anyway, I was five when I had my first kiss. It was with my neighbor who I hung out with all the time. And oh yeah… I. Was. Forced. I was very fragile back then and my aunt threatened to beat me up if I didn't kiss him.)**

**D: I don't own anything… I wish. **

**Way Two: **

"Yeah, I need a small, heart shaped cake that says: go out with me? And I need it as soon as possible." I talked into the small device. The German woman muttered an okay and gave me a time to pick up the cake. I excitedly slammed the phone and jumped up in down.

_Okay stop, you aren't a little school girl who just discovered she had boobs. You are a man. A man!_

I opened the phone after my childish rant and dialed Clary's phone number. I waited.

"Hello, Clary's whore house. You got the doe, we got the hoe." She said sleepily.

"I need you to meet me in the kitchen in two hours! Please!" I hanged up before she could answer.

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"Lightwood," I told the counter girl. She nodded and roamed about to locate the cake. She came back with a huge yellow box.

As I walked out of the bakery, I noticed how heavy the cake was. I, being the stupid idiot I am, ignored this fact and drove home.

When I arrived, my fellow friends (and Simon) sat around and looked absolutely bored.

"Why did you call us here? And why are you holding a large yellow box?" Clary asked. "Are you going to feed this to us and it has some sort of weird medicine and then we're going to faint and you're going to use us for your dirty videos?" _How does she come up with these?_

"Uh no, this is actually for you."

She perked up. "For me?"

"Uh huh…"

She greedily took the cake away from my hands and sat down at the counter. She opened the box and let out a mega huge scream. All of us froze and stared at her, uncertain to what it was.

"You a-hat! What the hell?!" she screeched. She bounded herself up and pounced at me.

"What is it?" I said desperately. I craned my neck to look at the cake. I froze. Holy Schism. Holy bleeping schism.

"I-I had no idea… wha- that wasn't the cake I ordered!"I said staring at the cake. It was a big fat cake. It was a dark red (like her hair) and it was… a middle finger. On the bottom it read: _"__Screw you, I'm leaving your poor, ugly ass." _

"It sure looks like it is," she screeched in my ear. And then, _SMACK! _She whooped my face so fast that even the fridge cringed. "I hate you! I hate you! I hate you!"

Once she left, Isabelle spoke. "Only 56 tries left. Good luck Jace."

**Hehe. I came up with the cake idea in the shower. Next one is going to be very abusive. Um, yeah. **


	3. Author Note: Sorry Guys

**Not A Real Chapter. Just an author note. **

Uh… how do I even start these? Anyway, I felt awesome earlier because I finally ordered my new iPod and now I can check my email daily and now… I feel like absolute crap. CRAP. Now, I know you're not supposed to take things seriously on here but… dang. I went on my page to check how my stories were doing and I come across a message. A message that says: "Fifty eight (58) does my rhyme with Fray. Also your title does no rhyme and this story is stupid"

This pissed me off a lot. A FRICKIN LOT. Because I already feel like crap about my crappy writing, I actually entered a competition on another writing website and I find out who wins today so you just made my happy thoughts about that vanish, and now I feel like total baby crap.

I… I just don't think that this is going to work… I just have to like blow off some steam because now I know that I am a much crappy writer then I think. So… I need a break. At least for now. I'm sorry guys, I really am. I'm thinking about not updating this week. So now you know why I'm going to disappear. I'm sorry…


	4. Way 3: The Bloody Clary

**Sorry I took so long to update this story. I found out today that I have really fricked up teeth. Which means three years of braces and maybe even teeth surgery… yay. *Note the sarcasm* And I'm also trying to pass my pictures from my camera. I'm posting some of my art on tumblr. And you should go follow me for that…. Wink wink… You don't have to though. I'm pretty boring. But you should if you have one since I only have one follower. Anyway, I want to get this over with. **

**Way Three (I think) **

"Perfect." I said. Jocelyn sighed loudly and climbed down from the wobbly ladder she had put all her faith in. "Thanks again Miss Fray."

"No problem Jace. Just don't break her heart okay. I know werewolves." She joked. I stiffened not hearing the joke but the threat. She laughed as I turned pale and grazed out of the room.

"You think it's going to work Jace?" Alec asked his eyebrows at his hair line.

"Does Isabelle sleep around?" I said sarcastically.

"No, actually." Isabelle quirked.

"Whatever."

"It's a little wet though. Are you sure it won't smear?"

"Not if someone doesn't mess with it." I said giving them a glaring look.

"He-" Simon tried to say but instead crashed into the poster. We all cried out.

"Holy Crack! Oh my god! Jace! It's smearing!" Izzy cried.

We all freaked out for a minute. No one noticed the confused red haired girl. Except me. Of course. She stood there with her arms crossed and glaring.

I looked at were her glare zoned into. My sign. With the damages that had been created, it had once said: _Clary, go out with me?_And then there was a painting of Clary.

Instead, to my disadvantage, it read: _Cunt, you oaf witch pee? _And her perfect picture was a bloody Mary replica. Not only did she look like Bloody Mary but you couldn't even understand what I had told her (though I'm pretty sure she could read the cunt part).

"Are you serious?" she said. Her face was a mask of boiling anger.

"No Clary.."

"So first it wasn't enough to tell me to screw off so you make a poster that calls me a cunt and makes me look like an ugly devil? Is that what you think I am? An ugly devil? You do not know how much I hate you right now Jonathan." She said using my full name.

"Clary…"

"Clary what? Huh Jace? What next? You going to call me a monkey bladder? Are you going to say I have a jungle in my pants? Come on say something? Do it." She taunted.

"Clary I didn't mean to."

"Whatever Jace. You and your manjina can go hump a tree." She stomped out of the room quickly.

"Manjina? Is there something your hiding from us Jace?" Simon teased.

"I'll murder you Lewis." I hissed.

"Damn, someone's on their period. You need a tampon?" he muttered.

"I heard that!" I cried leaving the room.

"Eh, go shove a tampon up your ass and leave me alone!"

**Hehe, tampons. I know it's not funny when you have one in you. See ya next Friday y'all! Follow me on tumblr now! O.O (it's jazzygoesrawr) (Snake Bites is officially on hold… maybe.) **


	5. Way 4: The Song From Down There

**I got this idea from a story I read a long time ago. Like a lonnnnnnnnng time ago. **

"Why do you keep trying?" Simon asked. I threw the paper I was working on at his face. He flinched but didn't do anything. Instead he just jumped on my bed and got comfortable.

"What are you even doing?" he tried again.

"Nothing Simon, I'm doing nothing." I said avoiding the subject.

He opened the piece of paper that had been crumpled and thrown at him. I silently cursed at myself for throwing _that _specific paper at him.

He roared with laughter. "A song?"

"Shut up okay. I'm running out of ideas."

"Uh, why don't you just sing a song that a famous artist sings?" He asked, his eyebrows rising quizzically.

"Of course! Why didn't anyone tell me?" I said feeling stupid.

"Well I did man. And I got your back. So what I'm going to do is find the cheesiest song alive and write the lyrics down for you. So… okay?" he asked.

I nodded.

"Okay! I'll bring it tomorrow."

()()()()()()

"You got it?" I asked the nerd nervously.

"Yes sir," he said running through his pockets. He brings out a stained, crumbled paper and hands it to me. It's folded in half and I don't even want to look at the words.

I knew I wasn't perfect at singing but I would have to try.

"Okay, here I go." I said waving him away.

Clary must have noticed my presence because she walked out of her room and stood in front of me with an annoyed expression. "What is it?"

She took the paper when I didn't speak.

"What the hell?!" Aw man, not again.

"What is it?" I asked. I knew the answer but it would be better if it came from her.

"Are you serious?" she asked shoving the paper to my face.

And there it was.

_When I look at you, _

_I feel like I might puke. _

_Your black hole is like a forest. _

_You're a whore _

_Just like a bore. _

_So see ya later, _

_Don't be a hater. _

_Deuces _

It was awful.

"Um… oops?"

"UH, you're a jerk!"

And there it was.


	6. I Answer Your Reviews

**A/n: Since all you beautiful people have decided to review I will respond to you! (PS: 58 Ways to Get Clary Fray {this story} will probably updated either earlier in the week or Saturday next week and the week that follows {since I'm probably going to be beat because of the first day of school.) **

**Okay so I'm going to do this quick because I'm leaving soon. (I seriously just copied and pasted. LOL)**

**imcrazyanditscontagious**

This story is hilarious I swear I nearly cried twice. I'm pretty sure my parents think I've gone mad.

**ME: LOL, thanks I try. Plus, my parents thought I went mad years ago : )**

Malec is my otp

I think you Gould ignore the haters. They can go read the cake. I get lots of hate on my fan fiction by guess who... My mom.  
>I ignored her. Other people loved it. I love yours and I think you should keep on writing. This is an awesome story. I love how Jace tries but it fails. Always keep writing and don't let people who suck make you feel bad.<br>Malec is my otp  
>P.s. Music usually helps me calm down. To blow off steam I do something by myslef with music playing very, very, very, loud.<p>

**Me: Thanks doll**

align=absmiddle class="lazy round36" data-original=" /imageu/5525950/50/" v:shapes="_x0000_i1025"TheEternalDaylightingRanger chapter 4 . Jul 19

Haha...tampons. That was good! Everything keeps on getting messed up! Ugh! Poor Jace!  
>-Lau<p>

**Me: LOL, I love tampons! I really do! Like it's something that goes inside you and sounds funny! **

TheDivergentMortalInstrument

PLEASE KEEP WRITING! I love this story!

**I WILL! THANK YOUUUUUUU**

Guest chapter 3 . Jul 14

No don't listen to who ever said that this is awesome! I mean who cares if it rhymes or not ;P pls update!

**Thank you strange person. **

Brown eyed girl chapter 3 . Jul 13

Your story sounds good. looking forward to reading more. You have a cool writing style.

**It's cause I'm cool (nah just kidding) Thanks.**

Guest chapter 3 . Jul 13

I think your title is very catchy! ThAnks for the head up.

**Thank you stranger!**

Lilacian chapter 3 . Jul 14

Who cares if the title doesn't rhyme or not? This story is almost as fabulous as Magnus and that's saying a lot! Don't let one review stop you from sending break-up cakes to Clary! ;DDD

**THANK YOU**

alt="report review abuse"' align=absmiddle class="lazy round36" data-original=" /imageu/3489594/50/" v:shapes="_x0000_i1028" mortalinstrumentsgurl1 chapter 3 . Jul 13

You are an amazing writer! Don't let that person get the best of you! A whole bunch of us support you and your story. You are NOT a crappy writer, you're creative and amazing and all those other positive things. Even if you're still pissed off and all, just know there are people who are supporting you C:

**GRACIAS**

secr3tshadowhunter chapter 3 . Jul 13

WHAT? I love your story! even though you might not think your the best writer, the story your writing is still very entertaining to read and leaves the reader wanting more! please don't give up because of a little negativity!

**Thank you so much**

Go-far-not-fast chapter 3 . Jul 13

OKAY WHO THE F $& TOLD THIS PERSON THAT THEIR WRITING SUCKS?! I WILL PERSONALLY KILL THIS BITCH IF YOU WANT ME TO.

**Woah! Come down buddy! (I appreciate it though)**

Angelus tenebris chapter 3 . Jul 13

That person who said that is the stupid one. You are a great writer and the other reviews favorites and follows show that. Don't let other people stop you from doing the things you love to do. I really hope you decide to continue this story even if you need to take a break.3

**Shank you (thank you)**

stealthy shadowhunter chapter 1 . Jul 13

Hahahahah

**Hahaha… what are we laughing at…?**

Guest chapter 1 . Jul 11

Fifty eight (58) does my rhyme with Fray. Also your title does not rhyme and this story is stupid

**Whatever!**

TheEternalDaylightingRanger chapter 2 . Jul 11

affddipnfgrsipn'hpojnthdpofrhp]fnh,['[kl zm,g;  
>I tried to write about my laughter and it kind of came out as that...<br>I had my first kiss at age 4 with this little Asian boy (who I still see amlost daily) that I knew from my church. It was on his stairs when I went over to play . My older sisters told him to kiss me, and so I willingly let him because I had this huge mega crush on him at the time to the point where I thought someday we'd be married. Ahhh, the girly fancies at age 4!  
>-Lau<p>

**Holy Crack! **

Irene chapter 1 . Jul 9

Please continue this story

**I will!**

Guest chapter 1 . Jul 8

What is "get" even supposed to mean in the context you're using it? Like, there are probably about 58 different ways to interpret it in that sentence.

**Yes there probably is guest.**

Lian4 chapter 1 . Jul 9

Oh this is cute keep going!

**I try!**

Lilacian chapter 1 . Jul 8

Hahaha this is a really good idea!

**Thank you! **

TheEternalDaylightingRanger chapter 1 . Jul 8

Hehehe! This is so cute! I can't wait to see all of the creative ways he tries to get her. This will be very funny and cute! I hope...please don't do that to me...  
>-Lau<p>

**I won't!**


	7. Way 5: The Ugly Jumbo Screen

**I totally lost count of what way this is. I got this idea because I went to a Dodgers game yesterday. And I thought. Wouldn't it be sooooooooo cute if someone proposed to them there and they caught it on the big jumbo screen crap? This was born then. **

"Come on Clary, I'm sorry. Let me take you to this game." I begged. I knocked on her door again. "Simon's going to be there."

The door instantly opened.

Clary came out and glared at me. "I'll go for Simon."

"Okay. I'll see you downstairs in ten."

()()()

"You nervous?" Alec asked me. I nodded and shoved through the group of mundane families.

"I got the sign ready and everything." I said.

We made our way to our seats. The baseball field was lightened up by the sunset. The men ran around scoring and who knows what. I didn't know much about basketball since most of the time I was killing ugly demons.

Once they stared playing people on the jumbo screen thing, a man came up to me. I nodded and he whispered deeply into the walkie talkie.

_This better work, _I thought. _I paid them a load of money._

I stood up and held the sign up. I instantly popped on the screen.

It was a second and I didn't hear one aw escape any mundane watchers. Clary read the sign, mouthing every word.

_I was so screwed. Why do the angels have to hate me?_

"And to think I was going to forgive you?" she yelled bitterly. She slapped me so hard. A chorus of different emotions flowed.

"Oops!" Simon piped in once Clary had stomped away angrily. "I guess Eric must have left his poster at the institute."

I growled. "_Simon!" _

**I personally****love Simon. **


	8. Way 6: His Hot Friend Jen

**I haven't update in a long while huh? I even forgot which way we are on… oops. I'm glad you realized what I'm doing here… Simon is being a little sabotage jerk huh? That's on purpose. He's doing this same thing this chapter. Like I said on all my other stories, I'm sick so I'm sorry if this sucks. **

After the baseball game, Simon tried to repay me by setting up one of his nerd friends (she was hot so) and it didn't work.

I still tried hard to plan what I would do to get Clary.

"This is going to be perfect." I said excitedly. I neatly folded the paper that reeked of sharpie and double checked that it was there.

"You got do that." Isabelle muttered. She skipped her way through a Vogue magazine and completely ignored me.

"Okay, here I go."

I walked through the halls muttering encouraging words to myself. I stopped at the center of the hall. I knocked on the door.

"What? What do you want?" she questioned crossing her arms.

I gulped loudly. "Well, I found this the other day. And…"

I handed her the paper and she unfolded the square. She gasped and the paper hit the floor.

"How… why… what?"

"I guess your notebook lost it. I found it on the infirmary floor." I said nervously. I watched as the tough me stared back at me.

"So. Would you go out with me?" I asked.

She nodded.

"Well, great, Jen. I'll see you later."

"Jen?" she interrogated.

Oh crap, I thought. I called her Simon's hot friend's name.

"Uh…"

"Yeah, about what you just asked me, why don't you go ask JEN that." She stomped away and shut her door.

_Ahh man._

**This sucked but I feel dizzy and I just want to sleep.**


	9. Way 7: The Chinese Mix Up

**Hey guys I'm****back. I literally just got this in my head like two seconds ago. I want to thank the person that told me how many ways I was on. (This is my seventh) Thanks person. **

**Way # 7: The Chinese Mix Up**

I had started to believe that Simon was sabotaging me. And I wanted to punch him. He avoided me and always licked his lips in worry when he saw me.

"Why would Simon do that?" Isabelle asked. She let her chocolate sauce drip from her spoon into her waiting mouth. She twirled her finger around the glass holding four scoops of ice cream, nutty nuts, cloudy whip cream, sprinkles, and peanut butter.

"Well, he's always the one running it. Plus, he had a crush on Clary." I reasoned. I picked at my chocolate milkshake and leaned again the sparkled counter top. "Unless you're making him do it so you will win."

She snorted. "Yeah, because I'm that smart. Maybe you're just paranoid and he's being normal Simon." She suggested.

"Or maybe he's trying to win her over."

"Or maybe you're just paranoid." She teased. "What are you doing this time?"

"I'm making a Chinese fortune cookie." I bragged. I showed her it and tucked it back into my pocket.

"Are you going to get it right this time?"

"Yes ma'am."

()()()()

"Jace!"

I froze. Clary arrived stomping in a stampede of red curls.

She held a broken cookie and a piece of note in her hands. I noticed that her finger nails were clanged with dirt.

"What did I do this time?" I asked stupidly.

"I smell? Seriously?"


	10. Way 8: Right In the Rubber Balls

**Hey Guys, It's Sunday and I know y'all are probably singing to Jesus but… this is practically the only day I have to write. (And not even that long because I have U.S. History HW and {Hard} Math HW to. That and I'm reading Peter and the Star watchers {or star catchers} by Tuesday) I went to a trampoline place yesterday and I am beat so sorry if my chapters are crappy. **

**This is way 8 guys! (I'm including the whole experience I had yesterday to this chappie)**

**Way #8: Right in the Rubber Balls**

"So what are you planning now?" Simon asked leaning against the marble counter smirking. Although he looked calm and collected, his glasses fogged up and glazed his lens the way they did when he was afraid.

"What do you care?" I retorted angrily. I straightened my posture and towered over him. The fridge, which had been open, creaked and shut.

"Hey Simon," Clary greeted. She had a left over Chinese food carton hanging out of her left palm. She glanced at me. "Jace."

"Hey Clary," I muttered softly, clearly embarrassed.

"We doing anything today Simon?" Clary began to converse as if I wasn't there.

"Oh yeah! Jace wanted to take us to this cool trampoline thing." Simon answered smirking in my direction.

"Well," Clary said glancing at me one last time, "I'll see you at eight."

()()()()()

The place was crowded. It was ten past nine forty and kids began to find their way out, leaving us with much more space. The lights had dimmed and now the room was glowed with sparkling lights and smoke.

"This is so cool." Cried Isabelle, like a child. She raced past me and threw her shoes across the room.

I tried walking at the same speed as Clary. She had her red hair tied into a messy bun and she wore ripped jeans with an over the shoulder top, AKA: she looked gorgeous.

"So you like it?" I asked trying to start a conversation.

"Yeah, it looks fun." Clary complimented. "I'll have to thank Simon for thinking of the idea."

Busted, I thought.

"Look Clary, I'm sorry about all of that other stuff. I just want to be okay now. At least for today." I apologized.

She noticed my soft eyes and sighed. "Fine Jace. But that does not mean that now we are BEST FRIENDS FOREVER!"

I laughed. "Perfect."

She shoved past me with a sly smile. "Smell ya later."

"Just you wait!" I yelled chasing after her.

()()()()()

We had been jumping for almost an hour. My hair stuck to my face and Isabelle and Simon were making out somewhere. Mangus and Alec jumped far away from us laughing and occasionally slipping at kiss.

"I am so tired!" Clary yelled over the blasting music. She bounced high in the air.

"Look Clary, um," I paused. Clary stopped jumping at looked at me with her gem eyes. "I-"

I didn't get to finish because I got a head full of a small child on my groin. Right in the rubber balls.

**LOL, that last sentence was a little dirty. **


	11. Way 9: Jace and this chick?

**Hey Guys, fanfiction hasn't been working on me and I tried updating like last week! Please do not kill me. I've been sooooo busy. **

**Way 9: Jace and… This Chick..?**

The lights sparkled against the dark room and blinded my eyes. Sweaty bodies molded into each other and sparkles randomly fell into my eyes. Definitely Mangus' party.

"Hey gorgeous." Mangus greeted. He had his hands wrapped around Alec's shoulders and his hair looked like Asian unicorn weave, which by the way, was not the greatest thing it sounded like.

"What is this?" I asked glancing around wildly.

"A party!" Due to the loud music, his voice was muffled.

A brunette crashed into me spilling spiked punch onto my shirt. She mumbled an apology and staggered away in her six inch heels.

What had I gotten into to?

()()()()()(

_Four Hours Before_

_"__Jace!" a loud voice clapped in my ear. I came out of my dazed state and yelped, nearly falling out of my chair. _

_"__What?" I asked with an annoyed look plastered on my face like a mask. _

_"__We are having a party." He stated firmly. _

_"__Um no." I declared rolling out of my chair and meeting eye to eye with Alec. He had that weird glint in his eyes that he only got when he had been talking to Mangus just before. _

_"__Yes, I know you need to win Clary that's why we're having a party!" _

_"__Do we have to?" I groaned. I noticed his droopy eyes (he only did that when he wanted something) and sighed immensely. "Fine!" _

_He jumped up excitedly. "Ooh yes! I'll go get Mangus and his glitter kit." _

_()()()()()_

_Back to the present wild day_

After Alec and unicorn fuzz hair had left, Isabelle determinedly pulled me into some spiked punch and dancing against all of the sweaty bodies. I still hadn't found Clary and I had already had more than ten drinks.

The world was blurry and the only thing on my mind was how horses pooped. Quite honestly, I didn't even think I was human anymore.

I then saw a small shade of fiery red hair and perked up. My drunk self followed the red head and into a room (which I was pretty sure was the bathroom). Then it was all blurry from there.

()()()()()

The sun hit my eyes and made me groan loudly. I pulled up against the blankets on my bed and sighed happily. My eyes snapped open as I realized what had happened last night.

Thankfully, when I opened my eyes, I was still wearing clothes. So was the body besides me. I turned and noticed the red hair spread out against the pillow.

I nudged against the body muttering, "Clary wake up."

I tried not to be very excited.

The body groaned and turned around with open eyes. They were such a pretty shade of grey.

That was the moment it hit me, Clary didn't have grey eyes. Clary was not a stick figure and did not wear tiny tube tops and a small skirt.

"DAMN!"


	12. Way 10: And she's hanging out the window

**Way 10: And… she's hanging out the window**

I must've yelled louder than I had intended because a loud rap shook the closed doors. The chick and I both blinked and stared at each other with shock.

"Who the hell are you?" she whispered pulling her clothes right.

"Jace?" Clary's voice interrupted my answer. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," I lied. "I just woke up with a tampon up my ass."

_A tampon? Seriously?_

"Let me in. I'll help." She declared pushing on the doors. Of course, the door was locked. Thank the angel.

I turned back to the red head who was rubbing the morning out of her eyes. Her hair was a mess and did not look freaked out at all. Unlike me; I was yelling and scrabbling around with my hands.

"You need to go out the window." I whispered frantically.

"The hell? The window?" She whispered back.

"Jace are you going to let me in?" Clary barged again.

"Um, yeah. I'm just… naked. Yeah, I need to put some clothes on." I glanced at the red head and rushed towards the window. "Come on, out the window."

She rolled her eyes and climbed off the bed until she reached him. "Aren't you a gentleman?"

I rolled the window open and reached out to help her. She shoved me off and tucked one legs out. She did the same to the other and pushed her hair back.

"Okay, there is a balcony in the main room. You have to go climb over there and then there is a vine hanging down. Just go down there. Be careful though, Clary's room is one room before the balcony so try not to make her see you." I instructed.

"Whatever." She shrugged. She pressed her skinny frame against the wall and balanced herself. That didn't work because she lost balance and dropped so she could hang. The drop was not much but I was sure she would not have dropped.

"Be careful" I hissed.

I walked to the doors and pulled off my best pained face. I had found a pair of Mangus' jeans on the floor and I looked totally like a guy with a tampon up his ass.

"Jace! Oh my god! Are you okay?" Clary yelled stumbling into the room. She noticed my amazing acting and a worried look spread across her face.

"It hurts Clary. How can you girls have it up there?" I moaned twisting and turning in the air. She grabbed me and dragged me to the bed. I would've laughed and smirked at the moment if I wasn't pretending that I had woman 'equipment' up my bum.

"Oh Jace. How drunk were you last night?" she whispered. Her face was so close to mine and all I had to do was reach for it.

_Maybe this time I will get Clary Fray. Even if it's so cheesy, _I thought.

I reached up to kiss her and our lips touched ever so slightly. My whole body tingled with her lips. She pulled away and blushed slightly.

"I'm going to go bring the kit." She mumbled.

"The kit?" I questioned with a slight laugh.

"Yeah, this happens to Simon all the time. I'll be right back." She muttered again. She pulled into the hallway and I heard her door open.

A loud bang followed the screech of the door opening. She screamed and rushed back into the room. Her face was red and her eyes were boiling with anger.

"_Why is there a girl hanging from my window Jonathan?!" _

"Um, will you go out with me now?"

**I know this isn't really a way but YOLO**


	13. Way 11: The Jealous Jerk Called Jace

**Guess who? Yup, it's me that one weird girl that is super lame and no one cares about! Yay! I'm so bored and my cousins are over and I hate when they are over. On with the story!**

**Way 11: The Jealous Jerk Called Jace**

"Um… can I ask why there was a girl hanging from the window?" Alec asked uncomfortably as he chewed through hid rubber like eggs that Isabelle had burned multiple times.

I set myself down from the chair I had been propped on and shrugged lazily. The bruise of where I had been slapped by Clary burned at the memory of the hanging girl.

"It's not like anything happened. She was just afraid that her boyfriend might still be passed out somewhere." I lied easily. I bit my lip and kept my head down so they would not notice the lies in my eyes.

"Is that what happened?" Lewis said with a chuckle of amusement. I almost shoved a spoon down his throat at his smug atmosphere.

"Yes Lewis, that's what happened. Now if you excuse me, I have yet another apology to give Clarissa." I said loudly. I swiftly exited the room at a slow pace until I made it to my room.

In there, I rested my head against the wall. My brain was full of thought of what I would do. I had only a little more chances to win over Fray and every time, I was either rejected, slapped, or punched in the balls. I wanted to just scream at her; however, I could not because then I would never have babies.

"What can you do?" I mumbled to myself silently. I hit my head against the wall in frustration. A growl escaped my throat that was dry like sandpaper. "You just have to be honest. You're Jace Wayland, you are the king of girls. Charm her with your charms."

I smiled. "What a perfect idea you have got Jonathan."

()()()())

I was dressed in my finest clothes. My vest was slicked smooth. My hair was combed back in ways that any girl could not resist. My breath was fresh and there was a beautiful smile on my face. What can I say? I was ready to get some girls begging on their knees.

I opened my door quietly and walked towards the kitchen were all of the voice seemed to radiate from. A sweet scent of caramel cake licked the air. Maryse must be at work.

"Hello guys," I beamed.

Mangus stopped flirting with Alec and burst into laughter. "Why are you dressed like that?"

I huffed annoyingly. "I'm here to conquer Clary back."

I smirked at Clary. She sat on the stool stuffing her face with cake. Her cheeks were full of flour and specks of sugar. She stopped to glance at me with a blank expression. After a minute, she to burst out laughing.

"Oh god," she said out of breath.

"What?" I said in confusion. My thoughts were a bundle of goo and I had no idea what was going on. I stared blankly at her as she wiped the flour and sugar off her face.

As if on cue, the elevator dinged. A boy, no older than I, stepped out from the elevator. He was charmingly handsome and smiled casually.

"Clary? Are you ready to go?" he said, his voice was heavily accented and the dimples on the side of his cheeks lingered as he spoke.

"Of course Chris," she said smugly as she stepped off the stool and into his arms. I resisted the urge to growl loudly.

"Is this why you were laughing at me? Because you got another person to please you?" I said angrily. I pounced towards the guy and casted over him. I wanted to laugh at how short he was. Just like Clary.

"Calm down man," he said slowly; however, he was not intimated at all. "I'm just taking Clary out to a date not marrying her."

"How about you don't do either and just get out of here?"

He smirked. "How about no."

"Jace," Alec warned. "Calm down."

"Yeah man, listen to gay over there. Calm down. I didn't know you guys were an item." He said arrogantly."

And that was the moment I lost my shit and punched someone.

"Jace!" Clary cried. "Stop! Go away. Leave him alone!"

I stopped and huffed. My fist was raw with pain and blood stained my slick vest. The boy was beaten to the pulp and was barely conscious.

"Clary, I just want you. Nothing more." I said grabbing her face with my bloody hands. I brought her face close to mine and tried to kiss her; but she jerked away.

"God, you are so dramatic Jace! You are a monster! I am so sick of you trying to get with me like this. I would actually say yes to you if you would stopped acting like a grasshole." She said through tears cradling the guy's face. "You're a monster."

God, when did love get so dramatic?


	14. AN

**Dear Readers, **

**This is not a chapter; it is an author note as you can see. I am here to tell you all that I am taking a short hiatus. I have already not been on but that was for busy reasons. And although I will be quite busy, that is not the reason for this hiatus. **

**As you may know, I have been going through some hard times right now. It's not really hard times per say. And if you don't know, I recently experienced a horrendous heartbreak. It's been three weeks and yet I still cry myself to sleep sometimes. **

**Anyway, I feel that I am still not emotionally stable to the point where I can come up with ideas for the future chapters of this story and the rest of my stories, I am sorry for this. I really don't want to but I already wrote a whole chapter and deleted it four times. **

**I may feel better at some point and release a chapter or two but I wouldn't wait up for it. I hope you understand and support this hiatus with kindness. I will see you as soon as I can. I promise I will try hard not to let you guys down. **


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